Let me tell you something: talking about Robert De Niro family is like looking at a life shaped by love, complexity, and time’s gentle or not-so-gentle touch. This isn’t just a celebrity gallery of kids; it’s a mosaic of relationships, chances taken, and real human moments.
Seven Lives, Seven Stories
- Drena – The first to enter his life’s story
Drena came into Robert De Niro world when he and his wife Diahnne Abbott tied the knot in 1976. She’d been born in 1971 and was adopted by Robert; she took his surname. Over the years, she’s walked her own path as an actress, model, DJ, and founder of Daredevil Films. At age 53 (as of 2025), she’s also been a mother a role marked by heartbreaking loss when her son, Leandro, died at 19 in 2023. - Raphael – The real estate pro
Born in November 1976, Raphael grew up away from the Hollywood glare. He built a solid career in New York’s real estate world, working with top clients through Douglas Elliman. He married in 2008, had three kids, and by 2020 his first marriage had ended. He’s now remarried. - Julian – The actor and twin
In October 1995, Robert De Niro welcomed twins Julian and Airyn with actress Toukie Smith, through IVF and surrogacy. Julian, now around 29, studied science and math at NYU and has tried acting he appeared in In Dubious Battle (2016) and played young Barack Obama in the TV series First Lady. - Airyn – The journey of identity
Airyn, Julian’s twin, is also 29. A few years back, she began coming into her truth, and in 2025 she came out as trans in an interview, sharing how she’d begun hormone therapy in 2024. Robert’s love and acceptance came right away: “I loved and supported Aaron as my son, and now I love and support Airyn as my daughter. Simple as.” It was a moment that felt honest, raw, and tender just father and child, no frills. - Elliot – The special soul
With his then-wife Grace Hightower, Robert welcomed Elliot in March 1998 . Elliot is on the autism spectrum, and though De Niro has said he’s not anti-vaccine, he’s shared the struggles of parenting a child like Elliot with some sensitivity and pride. Elliot has found joy in tennis through the Special Olympics . - Helen Grace – The little one of that chapter
Born via surrogate in December 2011, Helen Grace was Robert and Grace’s second child. Today she’s around 13 to 14 years old and stays mostly out of the spotlight. Still, she’s part of that chapter that spans years of love, wedding renewals, and eventually, separation. - Gia Virginia Chen‑De Niro – Pure joy personified
And then surprise, wonder Gia arrived in April 2023, with Robert De Niro partner Tiffany Chen. At age 79, Robert became a dad again. Gia is now about 2 years old, a bright, giggling bundle who, De Niro says, “has no judgment… she just is what she is. Pure joy.” {{At some point he also joked that he’s putting “I tried my best” and “Please forgive me for everything I’ve done” on his gravestone and I can’t help but believe he means it with loving exhaustion and pride}} .
A Balance of Love, Growth, and Real Parenting
Over decades, Robert De Niro has navigated being busy, being present, starting over many times, welcoming the old and the new. He’s spoken about riding the fine line between being loving and sometimes needing to lay down the law, because that’s real parenting.
One of his proudest “rules” as a dad? That you back your Robert De Niro Children unconditionally unless they’re doing something harmful. “They should know, at all times, that you’ve got their back,” he said. And even at his age, he loves watching The Wiggles and Ms. Rachel with little Gia, soaking in these moments with a smile you can just hear in his voice.
By the Numbers
| Child | Age (2025) | Mother / Relationship | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| Drena | ~53 | Diahnne Abbott (adopted) | Artist, producer, lost a son |
| Raphael | ~48 | Diahnne Abbott | Real estate broker, three kids |
| Julian | ~29 | Toukie Smith (twin) | Actor, NYU, on screen |
| Airyn | ~29 | Toukie Smith (twin) | Trans woman, came out 2025 |
| Elliot | ~27 | Grace Hightower | On autism spectrum, Special Olympics athlete |
| Helen Grace | ~13–14 | Grace Hightower | Youngest with Hightower, via surrogate |
| Gia | ~2 | Tiffany Chen | Youngest, “pure joy,” toddler |
What This Teaches Us
Here’s what feels real Robert De Niro Children family isn’t a neatly wrapped package. It’s full of different beginnings, hard times, tender moments, reinvention, grief, growth, and laughter. He’s a dad who has made mistakes, tried to do right, and kept loving through it all.
He’s proof that being a parent isn’t about perfection it’s about presence, even when you’re not perfect. He’s aging, he’s tired, he’s human but above all, he loves big and openly, and he’s trying each day.
That’s why I wanted to share this not to just give ages and names, but to say: here’s a man whose greatest roles have maybe not been on screen, but right at home, in the everyday of being present for every chapter of those seven lives.
